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"But... I'm... I do know that you don't like it when I say things like that.. but I'm nothing.. you're a prince.. The prince... I... I never would have enough to even it all out", he said and then was able to free from other's gaze. "... never.."
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Josh furrowed his eyebrows and shook his head. "You are something now. Before you had nothing but a name, but now you have people who care about you. I love you, you have new friends, and if you weren't here Lady wouldn't have anyone to keep her company." Josh spoke as his eyes softened, looking at his boyfriend and trying to show him just how important he was now.
"Without you in our lives, we'd be so much different." Josh whispered. |
"Is that true? I... Would that even matter if I won't be here? Should someone like me be with with you? Share so many intimate emotions? After all... I have nothing. I don't mean by that that you should be with lady Elizabeth... but I'm sure there are so many other people than me. Men as well, I'm sure. Not so far ago I looked through internet and there are some classifieds... and with showing..", he paused and blushed really hard. "..w-with pictures of their private parts... And... I..."
He fiddled with his shirt and then looked up, his eyes showing just how vunerable and innocent he was. "Is that... really, really fine to be with me? I was thinking a lot and checking out a lot of things.. And there are so many people that could offer you so much more than me.. It's not like I'm saying I'm not good enough... but there are so many people better.. Knowing much more than me", he said, his voice shaking. "It is not like I'm telling you to not to take me as a boyfriend.. But...... I think I really do love you.. and even if you're not my master by boyfriend.. I do want for you everything best.." He rubbed his arms, feeling like some.. trash compared to his boyfriend. |
Josh looked at Akira, surprised to what he was saying. As he spoke of being with others, especially Elizabeth, a slight frown crossed his face and he spoke clearly. "If you hadn't come into my life I would have married her already. My life would be horrible, I wouldn't be happy and it would be a forced marriage essentially. With you I'm happier than I could ever imagine."
Then as he heard about the photos of mens 'parts', Josh nearly coughed at the idea, not in a good way but thinking how…odd that would be to do such a thing with Akira. They had the real deal in front of them after all. It was hard to listen to that beautiful, sweet voice say such harsh words about himself, but Josh understood where he was coming from, and why he thought that. Once Akira stopped talking, Josh took a hold of his hands and looked at him. "I love you. I couldn't imagine another person ever making me feel the way you make me feel. And if I asked you, if you could find someone better than me, would you say yes you could?" Josh spoke before continuing. "There is always someone who's even more good looking, richer, nicer, and better than me, and same goes for you, but that doesn't change our feelings for one another, and to even imagine being with someone else…I'd never consider it." Josh said softly, with the most honest voice he could muster. "I promise you." |
Akira shuddered and then looked at Josh, it was clear he really was thinking all that.
"B... but I want the best for you.. and I'm not the best. Far, far below that...", he muttered, rubbing his left arm. "Is it really fine.. to......." |
"Akira." Josh cut him off, his hands stayed within his boyfriends as he spoke to him. "You are the best. It might not be easy to understand, but if I didn't have you right now my life would be so much more chaotic. Another person would never suffice. I promise you, with all the honesty in my heart, I love you and I don't want anyone else. I can't change my feelings for you now, so let's not ponder on what could have happened. We'll never, ever drift apart." Josh kissed Akira's forehead as he finished speaking, his fingers giving a soft squeeze to his boyfriends hands.
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Akira wasn't sure what to said at the start but in the end he almost tackled Josh and wrapped his arms around his neck. His heart was beating so damn hard that he wasn't sure what he should do to stop it.
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Josh was surprised when Akira jumped and hugged him, letting out a soft chuckle and hugging his boyfriend back, sighing in relief as he had the man he loved in his arms. Kissing the side of Akira's cheek, Josh rocked him slowly and held him in his arms, sitting down so they could hug each other for a while together.
After a few long minutes passed, Josh looked at Akira, running his fingers through his hair and smiling lightly, knowing that they'd be together for as long as they possibly could. And Josh doubted that Akira would be against that thought in the least. |
Akira was silent for the few long moments and then decided speak up for once. For once he decided to be curagous.
"Everything I can do for you.. and be for you.. I will be. To make you smile a be happy... Everything.. Even if I would need to let go.. Everything to make you happy.. To make you smile", he said, not able to look on the other male. |
Hearing Akira's words made Josh smile softly, never really thinking he could hear him say something like that. But there Akira was, standing before him and saying something so amazing. "That is all I'd like for you to do for the rest of our lives. And I will do the exact same for you Akira." Josh said, smiling once more and leaning up to kiss his forehead softly.
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