I think that your characters could work, whenever ther aren't so original. But if you're a good writer, then you will make such a wonderful story.
Is important that the personality of your characters deal with the mood of the story, the ambient, and other stuff related. They have to be focused, or they cannot work out properly or just the way you want ^^
Besides, as i don't know the plot or some general info about the line, I cannot tell you much more 'bout my impressions
